This is MacFarlanes first live-action lead role (he voiced the potty-mouthed bear in Ted) and for my money hes simply not great at being the leading man, coming off as more obnoxious than straight-up funny. Seth MacFarlane, Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West: A Novel. Albert: Hey, sorry I killed your husband. Doctors! Toronto Star articles, please go to: www.TorontoStarReprints.com, Conversations are opinions of our readers and are subject to the, The Toronto Star and thestar.com, each property of Toronto Star A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - That's a Dollar Bill! Like. Amick Byram. Not only did he adapt a song from the period, but he also hired a veteran choreographer and an army of Broadway dancers for the sequence. All you need is a little bit of the venom introduced into your bloodstream and you're pretty much screwed. One of A Million Ways to Die in the West is to give away all your jokes in the promos leading up to your film's debut. The one thing a sheep farmer has to do is keep all of the sheep in one place, all right? 1 May 2023. After backing out of a duel and losing his girlfriend, sheep farmer Albert slowly rebuilds his self-respect with the help of a married woman. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Trailer 1, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Ways to Die, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's Girl, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Things Could Be a Lot Worse, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's First Time. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. Anna vows to help Albert with many issues in his life, most specifically in getting Louise back largely by pretending to be his girlfriend to make Louise jealous, and learning how to shoot in what ends up being a challenge to a shoot-out with Foy for Louise's hand. Albert Stark, a mild mannered sheep farmer living outside of Old Stump, Arizona, hates everything about living in this time and place, especially the literally million ways he and others can easily die every day without a care, from shoot-outs, to bar brawls, to bites by rattlesnakes hiding in outhouses, to affliction by any one of numerous untreatable plagues and pestilences. Copyright 2023 Chinese Date: My father is a railroad worker, like every other Chinaman. You know, like snakes. Copyright 2023 The men who were courageous and resilient were the men who prospered. For a few chuckles more. "A Million Ways to Die in the West" lacks the inspired lunacy of Mel Brooks' timeless Western, and won't last the ages as a seminal swipe at the genre, but at least MacFarlane gives the . Holy sh*t. To build a home and a life in this harsh, unforgiving country required that a man be bold, fearless, and tough as iron. And in director/co-writer/star Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West (in theaters today), Neil Patrick Harris, playing the douchebag proprietor of an Old West mustache shop, loses a . Albert: Oh, f*** that. And, you know, the funny thing is, you don't even have to get bitten. By continuing, you agree to the Privacy Policy and A Million Ways to Die in the West hits theaters on May 30. His comedy might be irreverent, but the key to success in a musical number, MacFarlane says, is treating your material with the utmost seriousness. Copyright 2023 Meredith Corporation. Check out the interactive photo below for more details on the scene. The film received mixed reviews from critics, with criticism directed toward the film's length and MacFarlane's performance. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, "A Million Ways to Die in the West" is a moronic 2. Louise was right, I can't keep track of them. I mean, sure it's faster than the Pony Express, but what good is it if you can't send a picture of your dick? MacFarlane certainly seems to embrace this contradiction. This is the curious thing about MacFarlane. PREVIEW. Edward: Hey, dude, you really shouldn't drink and horse. Tap "Sign me up" below to receive our weekly newsletter Entertainment Weekly is a registered trademark of Meredith Corporation All Rights Reserved. with updates on movies, TV shows, Rotten Tomatoes podcast and more. 3 likes. Vulgar, crude, self-referential, and irreverent, A Million Ways to Die in the West is a typical Seth MacFarlane comedy. Anna: Yeah, well, I'll go with you. A Million Ways to Die in the West. Halle Bailey, Melissa McCarthy, and director Rob Marshall share the tale behind making their underwater musical with a groundbreaking Disney princess. Entertainment Weekly may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. 2014 Back Lot Music. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up, somehow it had made 20 dollars. 27 May 2014 There may indeed be A Million Ways to Die in the West, as the title of Seth MacFarlanes parody western asserts. Ruth: Oh yeah, it's this, its like from here to here. That's a dollar bill!". Apple TV & Privacy And if they dont work the first time, hell try and try again. Offers may be subject to change without notice. https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_110222, A Million Ways to Die in the West Screenplay, A Million Ways to Die in the West's quotes, https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_quotes_110222. PREVIEW. Edward: Okay, i'm gonna close the bible now. Seth MacFarlane's western spoof A Million Ways to Die in the West includes nods to such genre classics as The Searchers and Unforgiven. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. Anna: I'm a little cocky. 10. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. Opens Friday at major . The film features an ensemble cast including MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi, Sarah Silverman and Liam Neeson. Indian Chief: (after Albert's drug trip hallucination; in Athabaskan) Did you shoot the black condor and then kicked it in the balls? Edward: Hey, dude, you really shouldn't drink and horse. Barn Dance Comedian: I tell you, folks, this telegraph machine, that thing is nuts. All Rights Reserved. He is also not adept at shooting guns, which makes the death by shoot-outs even more likely, and is the reason why he cowers out of a shoot-out with someone to whom he owes money. If you can get a song in there, its just a nice Hollywood tradition.. Ditto the overdone sideshow of Sarah Silvermans energetic town prostitute bonding with Giovanni Ribisis bible-thumping virginal shoemaker. Then Stark must put his newfound bravery to the test when Anna's outlaw husband arrives with plans to plant him in an unmarked grave. Edward: Man, I see kids everywhere with those stock hoops lately. September 9, 2014 Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. Depressed and discouraged by how his life is full of disappointment and how every instance of love is then destroyed and robbed from him, Albert finds comfort in Anna (Charlize Theron), a newcomer to his small village. Opens Friday at major theatres 14A. Albert: Okay, that's Bridget, all right? The joke evolved into "riffing on the idea of how dull, depressing, and dangerous it must have been to live in the Wild West." Missing Trailer Scene: The bit with the doctor . There is an unrated, Extended Cut available, approximately 20 minutes longer. There's, uh, famine, disease, gunfights. What should be an ensemble comedy is more of a showcase for MacFarlane, who also co-writes and takes production and music credits. When the rivalry leads to a duel, he gets help from an unexpected, beautiful source. One father scolded his young son, "Take your hat off! Overly crude jokes and gross-out humor drag comedy down. Albert, in turn, has to decide when he will become a real man in doing what he needs for what, or who, he truly wants in life. , and to receive email from Rotten Tomatoes. If You've Only Got a Moustache. Doc Brown: Nothing. He's been dead for a few minutes. Joel McNeely composed the score and Media Rights Capital, Fuzzy Door Productions, and Bluegrass Films produced the film. Albert: Yeah. I look like I have Parkinson's next to him. Hell, this was Miss America in 1880 [picture of a leathery middle-aged woman] . Monty Pythons Every Sperm is Sacred is sort of the best example I can think of, he said. As a very loose rendition of historical fiction, it requires an ability to enjoy the suspension of belief in order to appreciate the humor, as well as an ability to look past the few offensive remarks to that are both poignant stabs at the time period as well as timely interpretations of . Quotes.net. permissions/licensing, please go to: www.TorontoStarReprints.com, Starring Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Liam Neeson, Neil Patrick Harris, Amanda Seyfried, Sarah Silverman and Giovanni Ribisi. . Anna: Oh, thank God, 'cause I was like ah [mimics gun to her head] , kill me. Albert: You know, there are a million ways to die in the west, Clinch. In Seth MacFarlanes A Million Ways to Die in the West, Neil Patrick Harris takes center stage for one of the films best sequences the highly choreographed and riotously funny Mustache Song., I do always feel like everything that I do should have some sort of musical component, MacFarlane told EW. This copy is for your personal non-commercial use only. I went to your farm the other day, and I saw one in the back yard, three way up on the ridge, two in the pond and one on the roof. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Great Scott. The film was released on May 30, 2014, in the United States, and distributed worldwide by Universal Pictures. Albert: She moved to town a couple of years ago to take over the schoolmarm job. Albert: It's just another way God mysteriously shows that He loves us. Cochise: There is an ancient proverb among my people: Sometimes the only way for a man to find true happiness is to take drugs in a group. It's Me, Margaret. This was the American frontier in 1882, a hard land for hard folk. The film follows Albert Stark (MacFarlane) who feels certain that the western frontier is trying to kill him while coping from his break-up with his girlfriend. Her "it's not you, it's me" reason rings false as she quickly starts up with mustachioed Foy, the wealthy owner of a mustache grooming products store, he who Albert knows he cannot compete in not being wealthy enough to be able to grow a groomed mustache. You know, like snakes. Albert: Yeah, I saw that. If MacFarlane had spent as much time crafting jokes as he did writing the lyrics for the amusing title tune (sung by country ace Alan Jackson) and the catchy mid-film number The Mustache Song, A Million Ways to Die in the West would have been a much better movie. He shows impeccable taste in how his movie looks (his DOP Michael Barrett makes Monument Valley a locale to die for) and also how it sounds. As Albert and Anna start to fall for each other in the process, Anna has to decide if and when she will tell him the truth: that she is already married, albeit unhappily, to Clinch Leatherwood, a vicious outlaw who, along with his gang, she and Lewis are waiting for in Old Stump. Is it possible to overthink moronic humour? Newspapers Limited, 8 Spadina Avenue, 10th Floor, Toronto, ON M5V 0S8. There is a post-credits sequence involving the gunman at the fair from the final scene. Then the mysterious Anna rides into town and captures Albert's interest and heart, but with her deadly . CookiePolicy A Million Waysto Die in the West is a gross-out Gunsmoke, with MacFarlane directing an old-timey facsimile of his modern self in the lead role of Albert, a cowardly sheep herder in the Arizona of 1882. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Jurassic Park Movies Ranked By Tomatometer, RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes, Weekend Box Office Results: Super Mario Joins the Billion-Dollar Club. Web. Your mileage may vary depending on your enthusiasm for his smirking frat-boy comedy. All rights reserved. Apple Inc. Set in 1882 in the American west, Albert is a lowly farmer with a nice girlfriend. expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Toronto Unexpectedly, Anna and Albert have a genuine connection--and as our unassuming hero learns the fundamentals of survival in the inhospitable wild west--an ironic, yet grave challenge against an unforeseen and mighty adversary demands that he puts to the test his newly found abilities. Albert: [At target practice] I fired a gun at the shooting gallery. Here are your picks for the Best of the Capital Region 2023 As a very loose rendition of historical fiction, it requires an ability to enjoy the suspension of belief in order to appreciate the humor, as well as an ability to look past the few offensive remarks to that are both poignant stabs at the time period as well as timely interpretations of . Casting was done between December 2012 and March 2013. A Million Ways to Die in the West is not for everyone. Anna: God, why are the Indians always so mad? Anna: There is something about connecting over mutual hatred that is just so much deeper than mutual love. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Sh**ty Showdown, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - If You've Only Got a Moustache, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - You Really Do Have a Death Wish. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. 15. Albert is attracted to her, initially, by her beauty, but realizes she's the courage and confidence he has always hungered for. Do you know what kind of hours he has to work? You can't blame Seth MacFarlane, that one-man comedy . The American West, 1880s. But, just how many ways to die are there in the west? But I got great tits. Updated at 22nd July 2015 by rearranging the order of some entries: What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? Albert: Oh my god, please! Anna: [to Louise] How can you be so blind with eyes that big?! As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". And just a small amount of venom in an open wound is enough to kill a man if he's Albert: Did he hear all that smart stuff I did? See production, box office & company info. to colleagues, clients or customers, or inquire about Even as a self-described non-dancer, MacFarlane knows how to assemble the right team for a showstopper. Albert cant abide the mindless brutality, appalling hygiene and constant danger of life in Old Stump, the tumbleweed town he reluctantly calls home: Everything out here thats not you wants to kill you.. Edward: Albert, he's dead. As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. He is also not adept at shooting guns, which makes the death by shoot-outs even more likely, and is the reason why he cowers out of a shoot-out with someone to whom he owes money. But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. By creating an account, you agree to the The only time it came out of nowhere was when Charlize said, "Hey, Ewan McGregor is doing a movie up the street!" There's, uh, famine, disease, gunfights And, uh, wild animals. He followed up Ted with 2014's A Million Ways to Die in the West, a spoof of westerns pointing out just how bleak and unromantic life in the Old West would've been.. RELATED: 10 Funniest Quotes From Ted While A Million Ways to Die in the West was nowhere . Our old schoolmarm got her throat slit by a fast moving tumbleweed. MacFarlane also relied on veteran singer and two-time Grammy nominee Amick Byram to do the vocals. When a sheep herder who hates the West saves a young lady . Albert: [Being offered a pot cookie by Anna] The last time somebody gave me one of these, I became convinced that prairie dogs could read my mind. Albert: Oh. If You've Only Got a Moustache. [Stark comes running around the corner and falls and his face]. He knows how to make people laugh, as demonstrated in his Family Guy TV series, his movie smash Ted and in sporadic moments of his gig hosting the Oscars last year. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. [leaves]. Isn't the fair on Saturday? It won't be easy because there are a million ways to die in the west. All rights reserved. On the other hand, Albert also has to find the gunslinging skill in order to battle Louise's new boyfriend - the cocky and wealthy Foy (Neil Patrick Harris) - in a shootout in front of the entire town. But if I caught you by surprise Well, Anna taught me just enough to get me in the ballpark. I never see him. the Terms and Policies, and to receive email from Rotten Tomatoes. It stunts their attention span. It was released on DVD and Blu-ray on October 7, 2014, and earned more than $15 million in home media sales. this link is to an external site that may or may not meet accessibility guidelines. Now, I knew my aim wasn't good enough to hit you anywhere important. If You've Only Got a Moustache. The film was number three at the box office during its opening weekend and grossed over $87 million worldwide against a budget of $40 million. McNeely bases his playful and robust score on classic silver screen-era Westerns, offering up a pastiche that's both reverent and self-aware, while the theme song, which is performed by Alan Jackson, and "If You've Only Got a Mustache," the latter of which is performed by Grammy-nominated American tenor Amick Byram, are as goofy as they are . A Million Ways to Die in the West is a 2014 American Western black comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane and written by MacFarlane, Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild.The film features an ensemble cast including MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi, Sarah Silverman, and Liam Neeson.The film follows a cowardly frontiersman who gains courage with the . Apple Inc. As . Like. And then, for a good reason, Albert gets dumped by his charming girlfriend, Louise, only to fall head over heels in love with the intriguingly mysterious, horse-riding and pistol-packing stranger, Anna. As a fan of Seth MacFarlane's series Family Guy and his feature film debut Ted, it's a shame to report that if you've seen the trailers for his new western comedy A . To order copies of Louise is gonna be there, and she's gonna be with Foy. Edward: Please don't shoot us on sex night. [Albert notices a glow from inside a building and peeks inside], [It is Doc Brown from "Back to the Future" working on the DeLorean, which is under a tarp; Doc notices Albert and covers up the car]. The real peculiarity of A Million Ways To Die in The West and what a waste of a great titleis that it's got no good reason to be a Western in the first place, tongue-in-cheek or not. Old Stump Bluegrass . What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast, Psycho (The Complete Original Motion Picture Score), A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Edition], Classic Soundtracks: Psycho (1960 Film Score), The Imitation Game (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), The Magnificent Seven (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Hercules (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Cosmos: A SpaceTime Odyssey (Music from the Original TV Series), Vol. But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put his newfound courage to the test. . She has a problem with retardation, but she's full of love. The American West, 1880s. 27 Songs, 1 hour, 2 minutes A Million Ways to Die in the West: Directed by Seth MacFarlane. A 2021 study estimated more than a third of U.S. heat deaths each year can be attributed to human-caused global warming. A Million Ways to Die in the West is not for everyone. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. Well, did he at least hear all the smart things I said? 2014 | Maturity rating: 16+ | 1h 55m | Comedies. Starring: Seth MacFarlane,Charlize Theron,Liam Neeson. Maybe its his way of paying her back for mentioning her in his tasteless We Saw Your Boobs song at the Oscars. Privacy Policy Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". After all, you can never go wrong combining westerns and music . It's 1882 in Arizona, the heartland of the American West. Set in 1882 in the American west, Albert is a lowly farmer with a nice girlfriend. He was Methodist, I'm half Jewish. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Edition] by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. A Million Ways to Die in the West is a 2014 American western comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane, who wrote the screenplay with Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild. 'A Million Ways to Die in the West': Inside the 'Mustache Song'. But theres just one path to his infantile humour. Although she states otherwise, the shoot-out is arguably the last straw for Louise, Albert's vain girlfriend, who breaks up with him. When the rivalry leads to a duel, he gets help from an unexpected, beautiful source. When she shoots, short cuts to the gallery show 10 targets, but 12 shots are heard and Anna wins the prize for perfect score. The shooting gallery at the fair has only 10 targets (2 rows of five), but Anna shoots 12 for a perfect score. 33%. She is now with a dapper, successful, extroverted store owner, Foy, a fact Foy keeps reminding him of. Me too. As Albert and Anna start to fall for each other in the process, Anna has to decide if and when she will tell him the truth: that she is already married, albeit unhappily, to Clinch Leatherwood, a vicious outlaw who, along with his gang, she and Lewis are waiting for in Old Stump. Amick Byram. I'm not going to the stupid fair. For example, if you drain a certain amount of venom from the fangs of a diamondback rattler into a hollow-tip bullet, you really only need one shot. Albert recklessly challenges Foy to a gunfight a week hence, even though the hapless sheep minder literally cant shoot to save his life. Albert: and all I had to do was distract you while the poison entered your bloodstream. Hes outclassed by Charlize Theron, who shows off her comedy chops in a surprisingly big way and generally seems to be enjoying herself. Comedy 2014 1 hr 55 min. Comedy, Romance, Western. and the Making a splash: A deep dive into the live-action Little Mermaid with a new generation's Ariel. And then, for a good reason, Albert gets dumped by his charming girlfriend, Louise, only to fall head over heels in love with the intriguingly mysterious, horse-riding and pistol-packing stranger, Anna. Anna: I mean we're basically splitting this country 50/50 with them. 1, Independence Day: Resurgence (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Hail, Caesar! Anna: I don't think you should leave tomorrow. Anna vows to help Albert with many issues in his life, most specifically in getting Louise back largely by pretending to be his girlfriend to make Louise jealous, and learning how to shoot in what ends up being a challenge to a shoot-out with Foy for Louise's hand. But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. Its justits a song about sperm, and yet they treat it with such legitimacy in their orchestration and their vocal performance and their choreography, and its this huge number with what looks to be over 100 dancers on screen. These are full loads. In Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West, Neil Patrick Harris takes center stage for one of the film's best sequences the highly choreographed and riotously funny "Mustache . After his directorial debut Ted was widely praised by critics and became one of the highest-grossing R-rated comedies ever made, Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane had the freedom to do whatever he wanted with . Although she states otherwise, the shoot-out is arguably the last straw for Louise, Albert's vain girlfriend, who breaks up with him.